Is it really easier when you have a chance to say goodbye?
We lost our older son last year to cancer at the age of 23 after a two year battle. He was an amazing man who did his best to face this battle and tried to keep his pain to himself. He never knowingly let anyone see the pain he was in. What he didn’t know is that his brother’s room was directly below him and his brother could hear him cry out in pain when he forgot he was home. For two years the younger brother heard him crying out for the pain to stop and asking God why. This summer, my brother-in-law lost his 18 year old son suddenly to a car accident. I can only imagine the pain my brother-in-law and his family go through wishing they had the time we did to be able to say good-bye. I can only imagine the regrets they must have for all of the things said or unsaid. The reality is I can only imagine. My son was commenting yesterday that it really annoys him when people say “at least you had a chance to say goodbye”. I understand that people really want to provide support and struggle to find the right words. Everyone means well and just have no idea what to say. Losing a family member is difficult no matter the age or circumstance. I cried when I lost my grand parents. I cried when I lost my mother. I cried when I lost my son. Is it really easier when you have a chance to say good-bye? I would suggest it’s never easy. Period. All we can do is remember that we have a life to live and that we live God’s will. We need to make every day count and the best we can do for our friends and family when they are facing a great loss is to make sure they know they are loved and needed. I believe there is no answer to the question. We can simply be there to offer a shoulder to cry on and listen. Can you feel that? That’s God holding you in his arms and carrying you through the pain. It will certainly leave a scar but we all eventually heal over time if we just have faith. Faith in God, faith in family and faith in yourself. Make it a great day! Barry P.S. What am I thankful for today? I’m thankful for my faith that gets me through this life. I’m thankful for a wonderful supporting family. I’m thankful for the friends that God has blessed me with. What are you thankful for today? |
Saying Goodbye
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